M. I. l.f.’s

Despite being one of the most annoying songs I ve ever heard ,Fergie’s  (yer one from the even more annoying “blackeyed peas”….don’t get me started on Will I was) new song ” M.I.L.F. ” is  a very clever video. It’s full of z list celebrities that unfortunately you will be able to name or know who they are. After you get over the shame of realising that tv has seeped into your brain and you now know these people out pops Kim what’s her name’s ass ( ok I know her name I just can’t spell it and it won’t come up on the spell check and i’m to lazy to look it up) I honestly think her ass has gotten bigger, well after seeing her last sex tape it’s no wonder, but it made me think what would she be called in the average irish pub. You can just picture her walking into some backwoods hillbilly hick pub and some auld pisshead  pushed against the bar who is bout 60 but still thinks that he is 20 mumbling just loud enough for everyone to hear ” I always liked a woman with an ass you can park your bike in and rest your pint on” and then a bunch of young hillbillies laughing not having a clue why but Shur yer man is great cric….He then goes home to look at dirty pictures of biddy from glenroe saying to himself ” still got it…I said something funny” and then plan for the next day which consists of pretty much the same as every other day of the average irish pisshead.  But I’m getting side tracked how did I end up ranting bout irish pissheads. …oh rite kims ass….wtf is going on there she is in the shower and honesty her ass takes over 2 thirds of her body. The rest of the women in the video (yes I’m ashamed to say I know who they are) are seriously some of the biggest slappers around but they can afford to be…Every one of them is worth millions….so as annoying as this song is, Fergie has now got every mother in the world thinking they re M. I.L.F.’S and now us guys are going to have to listen to pissed women in nightclubs thinking they re millionaires as they try to find one….Thanks fergie thanks a fucking lot.

I need to side step again, the FBI are not going to indite  Hillary! !! Are you kidding me!!!!39000 emails deleted some of em marked as “classified ” and she is not even going to be indited. The press statement said ” she got a strong slap on the wrists “!!!!  Personally I think what saved her was when Bill met yer one lynch at the airport ….by accident…In which he most definitely didn’t discuss his wife’s case with the woman who had the say as to weather or not Hillary would be prosecuted. ..so there is bill ( who now looks like living proof of life after death) sitting down with lynch and her husband and I personally think he used words to the effect ” let my wife off or I ll have sex with your dog….I ve shagged worse….and I am that twisted” so for the safety of they re dog they had to let off the crazy heifer Hillary. …least no animals were harmed. America is so fucked it now looks like a nut job and her sex crazed first man are heading for the white house!!!

So back to M.I.L.F’S….let’s look at the greatest M.I.L.F. of them all…Christina  Estrada. You may not have heard of her but she was a perilli girl back in the 90s and since then she has gone out with or married some of the richest men on the planet. One guy purposed to her in a bank vault …..cause the ring was so expensive the insurance company wouldn’t allow her wear it ( can u just picture it…do the rich realise how stupid they look)….did she marry him fuck knows or cares but she did get married to a Saudi billionaire  ( don’t get me started on fucking saudi’s) which she is now wants to devoice …..but dear god the amount of money she wants is enough to buy a small country. He offered her €44m but no that’s no where near enough when you spend €140k on handbags, €295k on hotels, €600k on cars, €79m on houses, €4800 on sunglasses and €31000 on phones ( how the fuck do u spend €31000 on fucking phones….switch to 3 luv they ve a great plan for €69 ) all of the above is per year…..The crazy bitch spends €2800 on fucking face cream 4 times a year ( switch to nivea q10 luv €20, I use it and I’m getting younger and fresher looking every day) plus she wants €140m in cash, ah sure you d need it, your might  see something when your out doing the food shopping that you might want to buy, who am  i kidding the only reason she would be in Tesco was if she was lost. All this is being heard in court in England and the saudi guy has an ex wife and is now dating a girl 35 years younger than him….does he just has ” I love gold diggers “written across his forehead. What a tool.

Don’t get me wrong I hope the beautiful Christina gets all this stuff and money cause I am just big headed enough to send her an email asking her out….The early worm catches the bird lads…and you don’t know till you ask….One fecking thing is for sure she’s paying for dinner……

so sumed up….M.I.L.F’S….what’s not to love….until tomorrow guys and gals.

 

Still bear with me as I set all this stuff up together 😆

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