TAYLOR SWIFT STOLE MY FAT GOLFERS GUIDE TO EATING A SEXY MODEL….


This has been a horrible week for freedom. But in Ireland we have all the solutions  ..u ve guessed it ..a cook book. In Nice a scumbag has destroyed the lives of people for no reason. Of course the Boys in Isil are going to claim him but I think they had to look up the member ship books to see who he was and check had he his €50 membership paid for that year before they claimed him, no matter why he did it, he was nothing more than a piece of shit and does not deserve a moments thought….his victims are the ones who will have to remember for the rest of they re lives the horror. As for Turkey….I won’t even comment… it sounds a little bit too like a ” night of the long knives” for me.


So back to the cook books, models who woke up one morning and realised ” hang on …I’m getting old and I’m stupid…I better write a cook book” are popping up everywhere. It’s getting beyond annoying. Models who 2 years ago could nt make toast now have tv shows about how to eat a blade of grass and tell you ” it’s a great form of protein ”


From here enter the advertising. Not only have these models got to tell us what to eat to become “beautiful ” they show up at music festivals looking stunning. What happened to looking like crap and enjoying yourself at music festivals and not worrying bout life for a few days but now it’s designer clothes and protein shakes.


It’s starting to become a little bit too much. It’s as if your not cool now unless u ve a cook book and look stunning. I can cook but I’m not doing a cook book ( who buys this shit anyway) to stay relevant ( plus ur ugly porta).People who obviously ain’t paying attention to these ” don’t cook don’t eat ” cook books, are the super athletic stars that are…..golfers.


When not avoiding to represent they re countries in the Olympics  ( seriously golf an Olympic sport….what’s next pissing contests) golfers must spend they re down time sucking the grease outa the local chip shops. Yesterday at some  God for saken kip of a golf course these rich idiots looked as if they had stolen clothes from the above mentioned models ( tiger where’s me knickers woods was not where to be seen) because everyone of em look fat and unfit and well….like ur local piss heads.


 I know you ll say it’s golf, but these fuckers claim that they can get injured….how??? Someone might stand on you toes with those nasty little spikes and ur pinky toe gets sore. If you guys are going to make millions wearing sports clothes could ye at least make a tiny bit of an effort to lose the beer bullys.  Oh and….GOLF IS NOT A STORY…go eat a blade of grass…ask the model that ye just woke up with bout it..she ll write u a cook book.


OK so this is a bit off subject ( there’s a subject???) TAYLOR SWIFT. Why can this girl just not keep some bit of her life private. I write a blog and I find that this takes up alot of time….how does she have time to have a life and post about it on apps I ve never heard of. I’m confused maybe she has like 20 Taylor Swift  look alikes who turn up at events and then in a Bond villian style timelines post about them . Maybe Taylor Swift really is a 40 year old dude who don’t leave the house and plays golf….there’s something to think about….where’s my tin foil hat…


All this nonsense aside, this week has been horrible….my heart goes out to the people of NICE….I’m wish there was words I could find to help you but I can’t…all I can say is….the world is with you in grief and to any asshole planning another attack…we will not hide in fear from you as we do not fear you.


I ve tried here to lighten things up and maybe take people’s minds off the horror of real world events for a while..but I have failed in this….I am sorry.

Freedom is never free….I love you all guys and gals, until tomorrow.

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