Well I tell you,  I learned a lot about butt implants in the last 24 hours. I feel like crap today so this is going to be the Porta Gregor style history lesson so kiss my ass she if you don’t like it ( see what I did there ….I’m fucking good).

Right so breast implants have been around since the 1890s but ass implants didn’t start till the 1960s ( i thought it was newer fad) ….so the first ass implants where just breast implants shoved into your ass till some dude decided” hey I make an ass shaped ass implant” and it was a success except the procedure wasn’t perfect….so the surgery would put you on you re ass for weeks and then you had the law of gravity . …what goes up must come down. So there is all  these people after getting ass  implants and they think they look great and they re dancing . ….well you can guess the result was!!!

So then they worked out that they gotta stick the implants farther up your ass for them to stay in place. So for about 20 years that was how it stayed…if you wanted a big ass you had get you re butts ripped apart stuffed with fuck knows what and appear in public pretending it just happened . ….then enter J-LO  and it all went arse ways ( I’m so fucking funny to day)

It became the time for big asses and j-lo lead the field. Suddenly every celebrity wanted a big ass and medicine produced. Now instead of having a foreign body shoved in you re ass you get ….your own body fat.It has made the procedure take only 90 min and I think you can dance that night without pain. Plus what used to cost $20k now costs $4k….making it accessible to middle class.

But that’s the problem . …too many people are going for these implants and screwing up they re body. Not everyone can take implants . ..or they react to them in both medical and physical ways. Think about it, your ass is one of the most used parts of the body and if you start fucking with it your going to throw  your whole body off meaning at the very least you ll need to get more work done in order to balance the first bit of work….why do you think Angelina Jolie looks like a freaky sexy alien.

Don’t get this nonsense done. Be who you are and let the chips fall where they may. if you re getting it done to look like kim kardashian well your a fool….and you need to look at the medical fails  of ass implants . …I ll let you look em up yourself because they are bad.
So until tomorrow guys and gals . ….Feel like falling in love with the first woman I meet.Putting her in a wheelbarrow and wheeling her down the street….

Love you all guys and gals 

Here’s Jennifer Lopez . …

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